FINALS ENDED YESTERDAY
I didn't feel as er euphoric as I thought I would, I just felt tired but yup, glad I'm liberated from the stress. Probably because I went to bed at 2+ the night before, trying to revise for my last paper and then woke up at like 9am to continue studying till 1+ in the afternoon (which is like 1 hour before the paper). Still not quite sure what plans I'll have for this 1 month break.
Philo paper was the shortest because it consisted of a mere 20 mcqs. I finished it within 30 minutes (?), not because I know the answers to everything but because I chose what I already think are the right answers so I wouldn't change them even if I were to stay in the exam hall for the whole 2 hours. Accidentally left a pad on the table while taking out my exam essentials (i.e. bottle, jacket, sweet, pencil case) and I only realized it when the paper was about to start. But I had nowhere to hide it and having a pad on your desk.... what message does that even send?! "That I'm having my menses and I'm gonna change my pad in front of 20-odd people" lol so I ran back to my bag threw it in. Calculus paper was.. bad. I felt like we should be given >2 hours. Wouldn't mind if they reduced Philo paper to 1 hour and increased Calculus to 3 hours.
Anyway, everything's over so I'm looking forward to Christmas.
Then there are some things I'm bothered (but at the same time, not really that bothered) about. As in, if this were to happen like 1 year ago, I would have a totally different kind of reaction towards it but now, I'm just like pretty much indifferent.
Last Saturday, I met Amanda for dinner at Star Vista after studying in school. As usual, we were just updating each other on our lives and there was this one thing that I felt was not exactly share-worthy but somehow, I shared it (idk why but we had this random confession time while waiting for our ramen and Amanda shared something so I thought I should too). Right after the words came out from my mouth, I felt like
I was too impulsive when I did what I did (with regards to the content I shared and not the sharing of the content). Maybe if I were to be drunk then my actions would have been more justified in some ways but I was sober. Sober and stressed. HAHA Not like I can go back in time to change anything but even if I'm allowed to, I'm not quite sure if I will do things differently anyway. So now I'm not sure if it was a deliberate decision or an impulsive one.
