Goodbye Harbour Front. Goodbye Vivo City.

I'M NOT HAPPY with Tiong Bahru Plaza. :(

It's not big enough and there're so few shops. :(

Ok, maybe this will help me to control my spending but.. it's sad! It's not fun. Vivo City's like way larger and when I need alone time, it's totally the best place to go to!!!!

Walk around the entire mall, visit all the random shops.

I MISS VIVO CITY!!!! :((((((((

Today was spent on PW workshop and unpacking/packing of stuff.

Oh well, I guess everything's more or less settled now.

I haven't blogged for two days. Oh well.

Life's been rather mundane.

I can't think of much to blog about also. N0thing interesting.

Same old thing.

Late for school. Collect EZ link card. Naggings. Everyday's like.. almost the same.

Even when I go to the bus stop, I see the same people. Like, what the hell. Weekdays and weekends... no difference huh.

Now, I feel like going to Sentosa.

I always wanted to collect sand from the beach (but I think it's illegal huh).

So what does that mean? If I were to bring a bottle of sand out, will I be "escorted" out of Sentosa with a few policemen by my side? Oh well.

Life's really been mundane. You know, even Coronation Plaza seem so dead. Ok, it's always dead. There's some salon at Coro and I saw how empty the place was.... the hairdresser was standing in front of the mirror... doing absolutely nothing.

Perhaps she'll end up cutting her own hair since there're no customers AT ALL.

It'll be one hilarious sight. Imagine her, flipping through the catalog, thinking.. "Which hairstyle should I choose??" then she cut and style her own hair... HAHAHAH! OMG.

-Ok. I'm laughing to myself.-

Just now, I realized how much my brother's actually grown and matured.

I feel so childish as compared to him when I'm like supposed to be the elder sibling.

SHAME ON ME! He offered me hashbrown when he only had one for himself.

Cheryl Tan Si Rong.... Fail.

Oh oh! And just today, I found out my display name on MSN is actually "Cheryl"/"Cheryl Tan"

HOW CAN IT BE???!!

I thought I changed it to "Cheryl. Cheryl Tan Si Rong."

I really don't like it when I'm just Cheryl. HAHAH! Too common. I meant, the name, not the personality of course. HAHAHA!! Anyway, I HOPE my display name is not "Cheryl. Cheryl Tan Si Rong."

I HOPE MY LIFE WILL BE MORE EXCITING SO I CAN HAVE MORE THINGS TO BLOG ON.

Suspended? Or not?

I'm neither suspended nor above the 30th percentile.

I was supposed to be suspended but borderline case so they decided that maybe I shouldn't get suspended. Oh well.

I was so irritated with myself today. Don't know why but nothing seemed to go into my head and that sucks. I couldn't remember the steps and because of my absence last week, I couldn't catch up with whatever the rest were doing. It totally sucks because I felt like some loser.

I don't know how many times I sorta swore under my breath.

Sighs.

When Miss Chen was about to read the names of those who will get suspended from CCA, I was already like "Just tell me. I'll get suspended. Anyway, I don't care.. since I can't dance well, I might as well spend my time studying."

Then, came the result. It's not that I dislike dance practices! It's just that, I think I take a rather long time to process sometimes and it's just getting on my nerves when you see everyone else getting it right.

So I guess, dance practice will be once a week.

My results suck. And I will say that even though I know, mine's considered not bad as compared to some other people.

I don't really like talking about grades... when people are around

You know times when people get irritated because some other dude got maybe... 69 and is bugging for that 1 more mark to get an A while you get.. maybe 30?

And then, they start cursing and swearing at the dude, getting all frustrated.

IMO, we all have our own expectations to meet so why get irritated at others who start complaining about their results? You only have yourself to blame for not doing well.

This Block Test, I didn't do well. I admit.

I wouldn't say it's because the other people are smarter than I am because I know I'm not THAT DUMB! It's just me. Really. It's me who didn't want to study for those papers. It's meeeeeeee!!

SIGHS. I'm supposed to come up with some study plan then submit it.

Oh well. I hope I'll stick to the plan then.

Good luck to me and also, the rest from MAD.

Tired tired tired.

I'm so tired. Currently waiting for my wet hair to be dryyyy so I can sleep comfortably.

Waiting for my hair to dry, that's one perfect chance and reason for me to use the computer.

Went to the recording studio again today for some PW stuff then stayed to watch/listen to Joyce's PW group do their recording.

I didn't bring my wallet to school today! I don't know if it's a good or bad thing.

If I had my wallet with me, I'd definitely spend more than $1.50 today.

I wanted to get myself chocolate mousse cake for tea time.. buy some random snacks or maybe avocado juice.. But because I didn't had my wallet, I didn't buy anything.

That's really one effective way to get me to stop spending.

To stop spending on food!

Math test tomorrow. Chemistry one this Friday. What's there next week?? Geography? Chemistry? Then there's some Math lecture test coming up.

Life.

Danced during break today because I found and finally downloaded "That Girl" by Frankie J.

I learnt of that song since... years ago? But I just didn't want to download it because downloading just seemed wrong and illegal to me. The classroom we went to had two girls studying there initially but I really felt like dancing so I asked to share. Then, more people came in but oh well, since they were just studying..

I feel like taking a nap.

Fell asleep while on the bus ride home. It so wasn't comfortable.

And I don't know how long I actually stayed in the toilet because apparently, I fell asleep.

Now what. Should I make myself coffee then try to stay awake or sleep???

I guess I'll most probably sleep since nothing will go into my head if I force myself to study now. That day was seriously crazy. HAHA! I went to release the school flag, purely out of fun.

At that time, I didn't even think I'd get any demerit points or whatever. Released the flag but I didn't know how to raise and keep it up there. Luckily we weren't caught.

Just needed some exciting activities to spice up my life.

What a Sunday.

Oh well. I spent my afternoon on Youtube.

And I found a great song by VFC. Varsity Fanclub.

I was actually looking for NLT then this song - Vanished came out as one of the searches.

It's really a great song and therefore, I shall add it to my playlist.

Monday. Monday. Monday.

Maybe I should try waking up earlier so that I can reach school on time.

And I was saying.. NLT. Yeah, the dudes can dance pretty well. IMO.

Watched some of their MVs.

Checked ISP for Sabbaticals and found out I actually got myself. 2 days of dancing.

What happened to my two days of eating?!

Anyway, I was looking for gadgets to add to my blog. Random gadgets so that I can be entertained at my own blog as well but I found something else instead.

The MetroNaps EnergyPod

This is one cool gadget.

This was actually designed for workers because most workplaces lack proper space for tired employees to rest in which results in most workers seeking rest in places like desks, bathrooms etc. True for students.

That's why I always make an escape to the toilet.

http://www.gadgets4fun.com/

I think the schools in Singapore should have this gadget. Is MOE blind or something? Can't they see how tired students are?!!! They should include some "NAP/Relaxation/Emo" time in our timetables and then we can all just lie in the gadget above. If only....

Farewell party.

Yesterday was farewell party.

Own activity. I guess that was when I had the most fun.

Besides that, stoning around was what Sylvia and I did. Stoned by the pool. Oh, that was nice.

When the party ended, we stood by the pool and I don't know, it felt so nice and relaxing.

If only I lived there then every night, I'd probably sit by the pool all by myself.

Sit there, with the stars above me, feet in the water or just above the pool.. Japple on my lap.

Oh well.

I almost killed myself yesterday.

Accident. I wanted to boil water, turned on the gas thing but forgot to use the lighter I guess.

And yeah, I smelt the gas and I was wondering why the water took so long to boil...

I had a weird dream this morning (since I slept at.. 2am?)

I dreamt of myself. Like, we were all supposed to cut our fingers. One finger. Cut into half.

I can't remember what the whole thing was about but anyway it was kinda scary since I can't take gory stuff. In my dream, the person in charge of cutting my finger was a kind person. I didn't want to cut my finger so in order to help me smoke through, the person just made a slight cut then wrapped it up with bandage or something so that there'll be a little blood, to make everything look more realistic.

What a weird dream. A few days ago, I cut my finger. I can't remember why.

But I saw blood and was just grossed out.

I think, last week there was something on donating blood.

I really want to since it is something meaningful and I'll be able to help someone but I can't unfortunately since my weight's not appropriate (I gained weight!) and plus, I'm too scared of the needle.

I can't remember what I wanted to blog about initially. I shall update again, probably at night.

Do we know what we're fighting for

I'M SO TIRED.

Back! From concert.

OMG. Tired.

I feel like throwing myself onto my bed right now but sadly, my hair's not dry yet.

Today was a day, full of laughter.

Recess time was with Sylvia.

Then walked about with Amanda also because we wanted to see her in the kimono.

I didn't want to wear because I was thinking how weird I'd look with that and my school bag..

Almost late for school today. I ran.

And I was panting so heavily when I reached the line.

Before that, I didn't think I was going to be late. I thought "Maybe still have hope" but then I saw people running so I ran too.

I was still listening to my iPod and running at the same time.

Then, my iPod flew to somewhere. YEAH! And I was panicking because I didn't want to be late but I couldn't leave my iPod alone. I didn't know where it was and I was looking for it frantically while people ran past me.

Fortunately, I found my iPod then I ran straight to the assembly line. And TA-DA, I wasn't late!

Racial Harmony Day celebration was hilarious because I was looking at peoples' facial expressions. It was damn funny. The first part was kinda boring and I almost wanted to escape.

After school, I walked about aimlessly around the school with Sylvia again.

Practiced a few times in RUA then off to RJC.

My jeans. They were kinda tight. And, I couldn't zip up. HAHAH!!

I tried! But they'll unzip again after a few minutes. So, no point. Luckily, my Transcendance shirt is long enough to cover up.

Had so muchhhhh laughing while in the holding room.

Oh yeah, the holding room suckssssss. So small and squeezy.

Before the performance, we had fun comparing marks to see who got the lowest for whatever subject then treat the rest or something.

Wanted to study but failed to do so.

Had fun laughing at Jun An trying to do some BBOY move.

Chat with Karineeeee.

Totally enjoyed freestyling outside Blue Room.

Weiqing, Sylvia and me.

Totally engrossed and we were all soooo wet after that.

Our performance was like the last and so we had to wait till 10 plus which was really late.

The food provided wasn't exactly nice either.

But oh well, guess this is the last time we'll be doing this choreography.

It's all good because it was such a fun-filled day. I don't know.. like, there were so many jokes and I think I really laughed the most today!

Musical Fountain~ Thanks to my imagination and Yuming's joker way of saying stuff.

Just had supper. Guess what?

XIAO LONG BAOs! WOOHOO! HAHAHHA!!

I'm so tired. I want to go to bed.

Goodnight and sweet dreams.

Farewell party tomorrow. JTS on Sunday.

So, when can I find time for myself?

Concert tomorrow!

And today was another cool, rainy day.

I love rainy days. Seriously.

Especially on days when I don't have to go to school and when I can just be all alone at home.

Loner. Whatever.

Just came back from concert rehearsal. FORTUNATELY! We managed to find our way back.

Steph, Amanda and I bought chicken rice from the RJ people for dinner.

Because eating wasn't allowed in the performing arts hall so we had to look for somewhere else.

Cheryl Tan Si Rong suggested eating outside, the hall. Like. RIGHT OUTSIDE.

So.. we could feel the aircon and plus, I didn't exactly think people will walk that way.. since it's already so late.

BUT, some RJ dudes walked into the hall via that door and we were sitting there, with the packet of chicken rice on the floor. Totally like beggars but we really had nowhere else to go and it was SO DARK outside! The RJ dudes walked past us and I couldn't help but laugh out loud.

Racial Harmony celebration tomorrow. Oh well, but I'm just gonna wear the school uniform because firstly, I don't want to wear the kimono. Secondly, I will have to bring my dance stuff and my bag's gonna be so so so so so packed again.

Somehow, I feel a little happy inside, whenever I see people of different races together. HAHAHAHA!! I don't know.. it's just like, I'll feel "Woah, we're so harmonious. Our country's so peaceful." HAHAH!!

I better try to do a little work. Life. BUT STILL!

The Geography teacher already talked to me today. Oh welllll~

I know I know I know. I didn't study for that test. SIGHS.

I really hope I'll do better for promos.

Like some other people, she thought "You have the whole June holidays to study!"

YEAH right~ Can't blame it entirely on Dance Night because I didn't feel like studying at that time. But still, I don't like it when people think MAD's just slack. Only Dance Night.

-END-

I like today.

AARG. Didn't go for dance practice today.

I think there's some problem with my stomach.

Oh well. I've got powerpoint to do. But yay! At least, I did something today. I forced myself to sit down, in the kitchen, with no Japple and I managed to finish up on my Geography essays. At least, I attempted.

I could have finished them earlier BUT I fell asleep again. On the table I think. Then, I woke up, finished my coffee then WENT TO MY BED. More comfy...

Dance practice tomorrow! I hope my stomach won't kill me again. PLEASE..

Paid twenty bucks today. AND NOW, I have only 4++ dollars. :(

Had lunch with Jing Rong at Cafe Cartel because my mum didn't cook.

Something ridiculous happened. If you're thinking.. who did it.. then you're RIGHT! IT'S CHERYL TAN SI RONG again. HAHAH!

I was looking through the menu then.. there were like breakfast menu, tea time, lunch, student meal.. and I dropped one of them like.. right into some gap between the seat and the wall and I couldn't take it out!!! I wonder if the workers found something missing... HAHAHA!

Then, the name tag I pinned on my school bag broke. Luckily I have spare ones.

And then! I kinda "got lost" at Dhoby Ghaut MRT Station. I forgot I was taking the purple line then I followed Jing Rong all the way to the red line and I was like.. "EH??? I walked the wrong direction."

On my bus ride to school in the morning, I was wearing my hoodie and I covered myself with the hood. HAHAH! Looked out of the bus... listened to some emo song. Totally like emo-ing. HAHAH! But I don't think I was....

The weather was so nice I didn't want to wake up for school. Slept on my way to school. Slept almost throughout the whole Econs tutorial.

MMM.. Some reasons as to why I wear a hoodie in school.

FIRSTLY! It's not because I think it's cool. Why do I need a hoodie to be cool?! HAHAH!!!

I'm wearing it because

1. The weather's appropriate
2. My bag's too filled with stuff
3. My uniform, the top keeps getting untucked and so the hoodie can help cover it up
4. I feel so safe and secure in it. Especially with the hood on. Then I'm covered from the sides. I don't know, it's like, I'm in some little corner of my own.

I was reading Hansel and Gretel just now. Life's been too serious these days. I need some childhood-related stuff.

Jing Rong and I were talking about University today. I kinda dread that thought.

It's just. I don't know.. too adult for me to handle.

No no no, not because I'm a kid.. but it's just like.. you'll have to be independent, like an adult. :(

Then, the campus will be so big. And I'll definitely lose my way... :(

Block Test results. Kinda screwed but I chose it so.. too bad for me. I was thinking of which address to put. Imagine if I give them my newwwww address, the one I'll be moving to in two years time. HAH. I wonder who will receive it.

OH YEAHHH! And! I SAW THAT!! That weird man who brushed his hands across my thighs at the bus stop! YUCK YUCK! And he gave me some smile. GROSSSS.

POWERPOINT TIME. Come on, come on! Then I can go to bed. :D

I like today.

I can't remember much from today..

One thing I remember:

Dancing after having pasta and I just felt like puking afterwards.

The dancing part was all high because I was dancing to Dynamite. Totally felt as if I was having some party of my own while Jing Rong was like.. in front, doing.. GP or don't know what.

During GP, the next lesson, I just.. HAHAH! Felt like puking already.

• Tried to stay in school to do some work.
• Fell asleep on the bus ride home.
• Leaned onto someone while sleeping.
• Sylvia's classmate, Walter, tapped me and said something but I didn't know what he was talking about.
• Walked home with Lisin and told her how dumb I've been these few days.
• Realized how foolish I really was and so I decided to force myself to wake up.

I love today's weather.

Had my hoodie with me and I just felt like some kid, holding onto some blanket. Warm and cozy. Some hot chocolate with marshmallows, cookies, a fireplace, some Christmas songs will make everything way better.

Today's weather is simply P-E-R-F-E-C-T for? EMO-ing.

Imagine. Sitting by yourself in front of the fireplace. Soft Christmas songs in the background. A blanket on your lap. The aroma of Van Houten hot chocolate. A book to read.

Woah. PER-FECT!

Or just sitting by some glass window, looking outside, at the raindrops.. falling falling falling to the ground.

Nah. That's.. fantasy.

Welcome back to reality.

Shyam said we shouldn't emo.

Actually, many times, after a few hours, I cannot remember why I was even emo-ing in the first place. Which probably shows how insignificant my worries were. I kept saying I want to leave Hwa Chong and I can come up with many reasons. A few hours later, ask me the same question and I'll have nothing much to say. HAHA!

I really live in my fantasy world... Do things as and when I like it. And if I feel like it.

La la la~

Saw my.. sorta, childhood friend that day. HAHAH! Geraldddd!!!

Remembered the times we played together. I remember going over to his place.. to eat. HAHA!! Oh well well~ Those good times...

Lisin said I looked really tired. Oh well. Finish up on a few more questions for Math maybe then go to bed. With a weather like today's, we shall listen to some.. slower song.

Something More by Secondhand Serenade. I fell in love with this song that morning when I heard it play on the radio. :)

Hopefully, tomorrow will be as nice.

Imma sloth.

I'm like a sloth. A three toed one.

Three toed sloths are lazy.

They spend most of their time sleeping.

They move slowly even when they're awake.

They have no sense of urgency.

I tried getting myself all enthusiastic for school today but I realize, that's so hard to achieve.

The enthusiasm lasted probably only for 2-3 lessons. During the first break, I was totally dead already.

Ate a little because I just didn't feel like eating. Then, we stood and watched people have PE.

I looked at them and asked "Are those people really happy?"

They were laughing. Smiles. Chatter. But are they all happy? Like, truly?

How can we even achieve true happiness?

I come to school, being rather energetic today. I wasn't late for school. It was a good start.

But something's just missing in my life.

What do I want/hope to achieve when I go to school?

I don't know. I just want a break.

No turning back. I must not skip school this week.

I thought about just giving up on studies but what will that make me? A failure in life. When I see my friends going on to university huh.

My dreams jobs are just.. a little hard to "make it" in Singapore.

HAHA! I want.. to be a psychologist, archaeologist.. Tsk. Not like there's anywhere for me to dig and explore in Singapore. I want to study about the dinosaurs, fossils etc. Or.. work with some environmental agency and help protect the endangered species..

I wonder if I will ever get a chance to do whatever I truly am interested in.

BUCK UP!!! There's still EOM to do!

I fell asleep just now while lying on my bed. Probably slept for an hour or so.

Because I locked my door, no one could come in and so.. no one woke me up.

It's amazing how I managed to wake myself up and not sleep through the night.

Oh yeah, and today! I COOKED MYSELF............. INSTANT NOODLES! Laksa flavour!

It was those in packets! So I had to use like pots... I think I made a mess while cooking BUT

I managed to cook after all so it wasn't that bad..

-END-

No. I'm the one in control.

The best way to solve problems? Face them and not run away.

Saturday, July 17 2010

AMPLIFY.

That took my entire day.

Before going to school, Tin Wei and I sorta "sent" Wang You off.

It's kinda sad because we didn't spend that much time together but I guess, December will come soon.

Crazy camwhoring. All the taggings.

Sunday, July 18 2010

PW meeting.

Was supposed to have some study date with Kelz.

Alone time at NLB.

Dinner.

Home.

The day's gonna come to an end soon. I asked myself, so.. was it a good day? Did I spend it productively?

Actually, not exactly. BUT. I learnt something while reading Readers' Digest.

DO YOU KNOW? Cows with names produce more milk?

THAT'S ONE COOL FACT RIGHT?! I was so amused by it. :D

That's because cows, like humans, need care, love and attention. Being friendly and remembering a cow's name can increase milk yield by 258 litres per year.

If I have a cow, I'll name it J.

J will be a happy cow.

I'll play music and the both of us can just sit on the fields.. I'll dance with J and I'll tell him/her stories. HAHAHAH!!

J will be one unique cow. It will dance to music only if, the singer's named Justin.

OMG. This is crazy.

The world has so many funny inventions. There's this one.. commuter's helmet.

There're times when we so feel like sleeping but we can't because, we're standing up.

With the commuter's helmet, your head will be supported so that you won't fall. And also, there's this message printed on the helmet "Could you please wake me up when I reach the stop printed below? Many thanks."

COOL RIGHT?!

And DO YOU KNOW? You can create diamonds from tequila?

So that was how I spent my day.

It wasn't exactly not useful... Just that, whatever I learnt.. they're just not used in school.

BUT THEN! You don't learn that sort of stuffs in school either!

I think, I make a better teacher. HAHAHA!! I can teach all the interesting and stupid stuff.

Although we can't exactly apply whatever we learnt to our daily life, I feel, these sort of stuff enrich our lives better.

T0morrow's another school day. Let us all, PUT ON OUR PARTY HAT and look forward to school.

When I'm 20, I'll look at my blog, read all my archives and laugh at myself. "How stupid was I?"

So, what now?

Today was a fun-filled day.

School wasn't too bad today because I had a fun time laughing crazily with Rena.

Yvonne made me feel like staying also.

I don't know if I was laughing to relieve stress or what but anyway, it was all good fun.

Dance practice was superb because I laughed quite a lot again today. HAHAHA!!

Jing Hui, Steph and me. The trio at the left corner of RUA. The trio who always miss their steps and just get all messed up. HAHAH!!

And Sylvia actually thought I was joking when I said I wanted to transfer.

No way man~ It so wasn't a joke. Sylvia's probably the only one who thought that way. HAHA! I was so serious about it!

Jun An asked yesterday. Yue Quan, Chen Xu.. Gao Wei.. Spiny..Shuting..

Oh well, I still don't know yet!

Anyway, after dance practice, we had dinner at Din Tai Fung! :)

Xiao Long Baos.. HAHAH!! :D GREAT and we had some "room" for us because there were 10 of us in total. Tonight's a good good night!

After that, we went for dessert. Not all of us ate though. We formed some circle in front of Takashimaya and just chat. If only we could do this more often! HAHA!!

On my way to Orchard, Liao Wei and Jeroooome were actually on the same bus as I was. HAHAH! LUCKILY they were on board, if not, I'd probably... be wandering around LOST.

Tomorrow's gonna be a day of fun too! Breakfast then camwhore! HHAHHAAHA!! :D

And after that? DANCEEEEE! :D

Today, I read this note given by Mrs Lok on our Graduation day (I think?).

And, I felt, I should really be stronger. I should not give up that easily.

Here's what's on the note:

"Dear Cheryl, today you graduate from CHIJ St. Theresa's Convent and start a different chapter in your life. I hope that someday you will think back and remember the little story 'Hope for the Flowers',and that you will always aim for the top, the best you can possibly be. You may struggle and fall, and it may be so difficult that you feel like giving up. But remember that it is these struggles that makes us grow stronger in life.

Above all, it is up to you to see the 'top' that gives you the greatest meaning in life.

May your life be an inspiration to others =)"

Transferring to another school is somehow like, me trying to escape from challenges and problems. (I thought Cheryl Tan Si Rong loved challenges?)

I really hope and pray and wish. I should face my demons. I'm not afraid~

I want to thank all those who tried to encourage me :) At least, I know there are people out there who care.

If only I have the determination and strength.

May God bless me.

I'm going crazy.

Am I still thinking of transferring? That, I don't know.

Oh well, I shall put that idea on hold. But it's been on hold for so long.

What did I do today? After dance meeting, PW, then the shirt printing thing at Queensway.

I didn't want to go home and so.. I went over to Harbour Front/Vivo City.

Walked around aimlessly.

I can't seem to make up my mind.

While I was on the bus, I was thinking "Will studying at home be more productive than studying outside?" The bus stopped at the bus stop near my house and I still didn't have a conclusion.

At Harbour Front, I was thinking "Ok, so should I go to Vivo City or stay here."

OMG. Why why why?

Why so many questions? Then after that.. "Yoshinoya or the quiet food junction?"

Then I saw some watches and I wanted to buy one but I couldn't decide on the colour.

Why am I doing with my current life? I don't know.

I feel like I'm totally aimless.

And I hate this feeling. Maybe I should undergo some counselling.

I DON'T KNOW WHAT I WANT AND THIS SUCKS.

Maybe, from today onwards, I should train myself to be more decisive. Give myself at most 10 seconds so that I wouldn't ponder over it for so long and end up doing nothing.

I watched Karate Kid today. It taught me to be stronger.

Like Jaden Smith, who didn't give up easily and continued fighting. For that, he earned respect.

BUT AFTER ALL, talk is nothing. It's really just bullshit.

Talking is easy but when you try to do it, it's just.... not that easy after all.

What's wrong with me?

I don't really want to stay in Hwa Chong anymore.

Why did I wake up late today?! :(

Again, I missed school. Shit. I'm really getting from bad to worse.

Yesterday, I was so tired, I didn't bother to blog. OH! I remember, I was late for school yesterday.

I don't know if my CT recorded it down or not because I was already in the central plaza!!! :( I ran to school and placed my bag at some random corner, stood in line with some random J2 class during the singing of national anthem and pledge taking. I skipped over to my class while they were making announcements. And damn it, some teacher came over to ask me for my name and class.

He asked me if I knew I was late for school and why I walked over to my class while they were making announcements.

"MMM.. They didn't collect my EZ link card so I wasn't late! The teacher allowed me to just go into the school so I presumed so. I was already in school."

"You know that as long as you're not with your class, you're considered late? BLAH BLAH BLAH"

Damn it. That ruined my day. That's one thing PUSHING me away from Hwa Chong. HAHAH!! Yeah, I was thinking of making a transfer over to CJC. And I even came up with some "mind-map" to sort out my thoughts. It was really crazy.

HAHA! Up till today, I'm still like.. leaning towards the CJC side. I keep telling myself to live in the present, to accept this school but somehow.. there're still push factors and I think, the pull factors coming from CJC are stronger. The ONE MAIN thing that's keeping me here in Hwa Chong is not wanting to leave MAD Hip hop :( Because we've all trained and practised so hard together and I feel like, I don't want to give up something I yearned for... Yeah. I don't want to lose all my close friends.

Talked to Jeslyn before going for CCA and I told her how much I wanted to leave this school. I told her my reason - I think I'll never be able to FULLY INTEGRATE into this school because I wasn't from Nanyang or whatever.. Yeah.

I even consulted my CT about it. That shows, how much I really want to leave Hwa Chong.

But I know, out there, there are people who feel like me.

Oh well, but Madam Ong said I'll have to find a JC where I can go to. Then, I'll have to go talk to Mr Chan (When I don't know who he is) and mmm.. I heard there'll be counselling and all those stuff too. She asked me for my reasons. At that time, I really don't know what crap I gave her. She asked me if it was stress but I said no. I feel no stress at all, I'm laxing my way through my schooldays which is TOTALLY BAD. I think I'm only stressed when it comes to PW. HAHAHAHA!! Because all the EOM and shit. What PI.

I don't know. Amanda Chan was against my idea because she said it'll be a lot of trouble. Madam Ong also advised me not to because she said it's just a few months left.

But you know how long I have to tolerate (not accept) this "FEW MONTHS"?

Maybe if I go to school just for dance, dance and nothing else then ok, I don't mind the "few months" but now. SUCKS. School is just a place where I learn nothing (because really, nothing goes into my head) and where I keep getting demerit points. How can you ask me to stay in a place like this...

School everyday is like.. something I really dread. Every Monday, I go to school and I'm waiting for the week to end so that I can get away from school. That's how much I dislike school. It was never like this for me. I don't know.. oh well.

I shall go to school later on for that dance meeting then.. PW.

SABBATICALS.

HATE SABBATICALS.

I got into.. New School Hip Hop. Something I chose because I really didn't know what else to choose. But I didn't really want to get in because! I WANTED the food ones! :(

Now, I can't learn how to eat fruit tarts.

:(

2 out of 4 were something related to food and eating but I DIDN'T GET THEM :(

I planned to have 2 days of eating. So it'll be like.. buffet.

WHY WHY WHY :(

Tsk. No school for me again today.

I really wanted to not go to school simply because I didn't feel like it. However, my stomach gave me problems. So I didn't go in the end.

Dance tomorrow. I don't recall studying A LOT this year. I only remember all the dance practices. How how how... should I perform for all?????

I shall choose the food ones again for the next day. BUT OH.. WAIT.... I don't even know if my current course last for two days.

OK! ONE DAY! -PHEW-

I HOPE AND PRAY. EH?! But! I don't even know if the food ones will be offered on the second day or not!

Oh well.

Actually, I wonder why.. can't I just have home-schooling? I think going to school is rather unproductive for me. HAHAH! No, not because I think I'm smart or what. But because, I think I'm spending time to SLEEP in school? The only thing I find PRODUCTIVE and USEFUL about school is DANCE.

Mhm. After every dance practice, it'll be like.. "Ok, so I did something useful in school today."

At least, I DANCED. But, when I go to school just for studying, I don't study.

After blogging, I still have to go to school. So, I guess, I just have to learn to accept this.

School's really making me feel SO TIRED.

Was it like that in my secondary school? I can't really remember but I know I go crazy, laughing everyday at the back of the classroom, bullying people.. HAHAHAH!! Good old days.

Now... mmm. Seriously, the only thing I like about school now is just Dance.

If not for dance, maybe, I'd prefer going to CJC. Yeah, I always felt like I should have gone there but.. if I were over there, I probably won't join dance. Now, what am I crapping about again...

I'm supposed to accept school. Wherever I currently am.

Just checked EMB and I saw this Math peer tutoring programme.

One condition:

1. Tutor and Tutee must be of the same GENDER.

HAHA! It's quite amusing. Why must they both be of the same gender? Please.. it's just Math. Not like it will lead to something else. Math alone, is enough to handle. HAHHA!! The way they put it, it's as if someone will get raped in the process. HAHAHAH!

Ok fine~ I shall not let my imagination run too wild.

Issues and Ideas. Be done with it.

I finally did 1 proper AQ. HAHAHA!!

I think this is like.. the first time, I wrote it, following the format.

That's the good news.

What's the bad one? I still have a few more articles to do for Issues and Ideas.

Slept at 1am and woke up at 1pm.

Finally tried making ice tea. Ok, it wasn't exactly like.. made. I just needed to add cold water and TA-DA! Ice tea for me!

After drinking, I was getting ready for bedtime THEN I realized I was having my thing. Not saying that drinking Ice tea results in menses but anyway, luckily I found out I was having it.

Didn't do much packing today because I was trying to do GP but STILL, there are so many blanks to fill.

I felt like puking when I read the article on abortion today. That day, I was reading the one on death penalty. Actually, I still don't know if death penalty should be legalized or not. On one hand, I feel like people should be punished because they have committed a crime, so ruthless. They are like monsters and should be banished from Earth. BUT, on the other hand, I feel like maybe it was just a moment of folly. Maybe they should be given another chance because I always felt and thought "People are born good" and so... maybe they have their reasons. And abortion also.. it's cruel. :( But some people have no choice and it's not like they want to give up their baby. Mothers wouldn't do that to their own child. I believe. Then, I got reminded of the video on abortion we watched last year. I covered my eyes because it was too much for me to take. The blood. The entire, cruel process. When you see something so vulnerable and small being deprived of its chance to survive. :( And they showed the "pile" of dead fetuses. :(

ANYWAY....

I had a very stupid experience with a vacuum cleaner today.

It was ridiculous. I was asked to use the vacuum cleaner. Ok, so.. firstly, I asked where the vacuum cleaner was, since I never used it before! I meant, the one in my house. I used one before but not that one in my house. I didn't even know it existed. Then, I was thinking, how do I even get it started. There was no wire or whatever. So I thought maybe this one is new.. High-tech.. maybe, solar powered or... battery or whatever. HAHAHA! So I just switched it on but.... it didn't work. I asked my brother "Eh? Don't we need to plug it in or something??" and HE ANNOUNCED it to everyone who was outside -my granny, my aunt and my mum. Then they were like "WHAT??? NO NEED TO PLUG IN?! How is that possible?!"

OMGGGG.... I couldn't find the wire and I never operated it before so HOW WOULD I KNOW??? Oh well~

Rehearsal at Nanyang tomorrow. I was thinking if I can not go to school tomorrow then I remembered.. Issues and Ideas, Rehearsal... and GAO WEI's birthday! I must really keep myself going for school. Ever since I came into HC, I think, I skipped school a few times already. There were a few when I was really not feeling well but yeah, sometimes, I just don't feel like going to school.

Motivation. Discipline. I lost both of you. Please come back.

Oh yeah, and brain too.

On Facebook, I saw some ***-related stuffs and I was like.. "I should have been part of you."

Oh well, I'm wherever I am now and there's no turning back. Treasure the present - that's what I should be doing.

How random.

Sometimes, I wonder why I feel so sleepy IMMEDIATELY after drinking coffee.

"There are a number of people who think the way to get rid of tiredness is to drink more coffee and other drinks containing caffeine. While caffeine delivers a quick energy boost, it is a short-lived boost. After a while you feel even more tired than before. If you try to get more energy by drinking coffee or using medication, you are trying to fix the symptom, not the cause."

Sleeping during the day is generally a bad idea, you don't get more energy and you may have trouble falling asleep in the evening. But short naps, often called power naps, done the right way can boost your energy

http://www.articlesbase.com/fitness-articles/feeling-tired-get-more-energy-by-sleeping-less-1022560.html

No wonder I fell asleep immediately after drinking coffee (Ok, after washing the jumbo mug)

Now, I feel tired.

And I was thinking of "Counting sheep".

Why do we even count sheep when we can't fall asleep?? Why can't we count... monkeys? They are more agile and we'll get tired counting of them faster isn't it??

Ok, I found out why. In ancient Britain, shepherds count their sheep, to make sure each one of the herd was present and accounted for, before the shepherds could bed down for the night.

But is it even effective? (I always lose count because some sheep will not want to jump over the fence.. Then sometimes, two or more will jump at the same time. That's for me.)

"Scientists suspect that the mental task of counting sheep is just too boring for our minds to stay fixed on it for long. More complex and pleasant tasks, such as imagining an ocean or forest scene, for example, helps our minds keep focused until they are eventually lulled off to sleep."

http://ezinearticles.com/?Does-Counting-Sheep-Really-Help-Us-Go-to-Sleep?&id=4244198

Ok. How random.

What is that magical potion?

I finally did something on Issues and Ideas.

Today's PEACEFUL.

OH! I just remembered something we were discussing about yesterday, something that got me really fascinated.

It was about some drink(??) that can help build muscles?

I heard it was something with proteins. I DON'T UNDERSTAND.

How can a drink make you grow muscles??

It's not like you're some plant. Where water can make you grow taller and stronger.

The picture I'm imagining in my head is... totally weird. I don't understand!!!

It's as if that drink is MAGICAL.

Ok. Me and my fantasy world. HAHA!

I think my memory's really really bad. That's why I got myself a notebook to jot things down. HAHAH!! I HOPE IT'LL WORK.

There's some baby photo in that notebook. I used that photo when I was in Sec 4 because we were asked to bring our baby photo. Until today, I don't know if I'm the one in the photo or not. Nevermind, it's in my notebook. I THINK it should be me.

That day, I couldn't remember if I brushed my teeth like right after I washed up.

I washed my face then brushed my teeth. When I stepped into the bathroom, I was like "Eh? Did I brush my teeth?"

Finally, I finished reading my novel. Unbeaten. GOOD.

Lucky for me, I didn't spend ten dollars for nothing.

-END-

Another Colour Quiz and another entry.

Your Existing Situation (To some extent, yes.)

"Craves change and new things, always looking for new adventures and activities. Becomes restless and frustrated when she has to wait to long for things to develop. her impatience leads to irritability and a desire to move on to the next project."

Your Stress Sources (YES!)

"Wishes for freedom and independence, free from limitations and restrictions except for the ones she choices to give himself."

Your Restrained Characteristics

Current events leave her feeling forced into compromise in order to avoid being cut off from affection or future cooperation.

Emotionally distant even from those closest to her.

"Seeking to broaden her horizons and believes her hopes and dreams are realistic. Worries she may not be able to do the things she wants and needs to escape to a peaceful, quiet environment in order to restore her confidence." ---> YES YES YES.

Your Desired Objective (This one is quite true)

-I'm always thinking of when I can just go Coffeebean/Gloria Jeans.. sit there with Japple, ipod and read a novel for the entire day. Have a cake, coffee.. HAHAHHAHAHAHA!!

"Finds pleasure in the finer things of life. Wishes to over-indulge in a lavish, luxurious lifestyle."

Your Actual Problem (MMM... Not too sure about this one. True to some extent.)

-That's why I like being alone at times then I can do WHATEVER I feel like doing. You know sometimes when we are all in A BIG GROUP (Yeah, it may be fun), we can't do WHATEVER we feel like doing because we have to think of others.

Longs the freedom to make her own decisions and plans without the criticism and restrictions of others. Uses her charm to deal with others and get what she wants.

Taken from: http://www.colorquiz.com/

So what happened in school today? MMMM....

I was almost LATE again. Today, it was because I woke up late. I didn't even had breakfast :(

BUT! I managed to get to school by BUS!

And not by TAXI! I thought I was going to be late and I even wanted to have breakfast at Macs before going to school (Since I was going to be late anyway).

When I reached school, I saw people still in the canteen. Some had their bags with them and I was thinking "Huh? So is assembly over or not?" HAHAHAHAH!!

I got back Geography today. 4/25. Are you happy for me?!

I don't feel anything. Because I know, I never studied. There were like two questions. I didn't know how to do one ENTIRELY because I didn't memorize those content then for the other question, I knew only one PART briefly.

Now, all that's on my mind is... if I will be suspended from CCA or not. I want to perform!!!!

You know how it feels to watch your friends perform and you're like.. down there. When you could have been up there. I know I'll be damn sad.

We had some Entrepreneur thing so lessons ended at 11am? That entrepreneur thing... I think I slept through it.

And when I woke up, I realized that the table.. was kinda cracked. It can't be me! I'm not that heavy!

Tomorrow's Saturday. I wanted to go out to do my work. That stupid "Issues and Ideas". I haven't even wrote anything in it yet. I guess, not even my name.

But my mum ruined my plans. I will be staying at home. Sucks.

What about Sunday? When can I have my own day???????

Anyway, I think I can get help for Chemistry already! YAY!! I have my senior to thank... VALERIE TOH!!

Tsk. Somehow, I always feel MISUNDERSTOOD.

The things I say, the things I do, sometimes, people just take them the wrong way. Oh well~

Who cares. As long as I know what I'm doing, I guess nothing else matters.

I said something really stupid today. (I FEEL SO RETARDED)

We were talking about the chicken burger sold in Fish Tank then Xin Yun said something like "Yeah, it's nice but today no chicken." And what did I ask... "HUH?! So you bought only the burger?!"

I wasn't using my brainnnnnnn. But at that time, I really thought maybe she just bought the burger.

And Steph Pang said her classmate thinks I'm retarded because they saw me falling backwards while talking to her once. TSKKKK.

Just now, I think I shrieked or made some high-pitched noise BECAUSE! I was thinking if I should run after my bus. So near yet so far. When I was running towards it, it left. The people standing at the bus stop were staring at me, MOST PROBABLY because of the sound I made. HAHAHAHAHHAHA!!

I don't feel like giving this post any title.

I was thinking of personality quizzes since I don't exactly know how and what am I feeling right now. This quiz is accurate to a large extent. HAHAHA!!

Your Existing Situation (???)

Desperately needs a close relationship with an affectionate and accepting partner; or some other way to be recognized and known.

Your Restrained Characteristics

"His desire to avoid open conflict and tension forces her to put her desires on hold, even though she is feeling restrained and uneasy."

Giving more than she is getting back and feels misunderstood and unappreciated. Feels she is being forced into compromising and even her close relationships leave her feeling emotional distant.

Current situations have left her feeling overwhelmed and tormented. Needs to avoid further activity or demands and concentrate on relaxing and becoming emotionally sound.

Current situation is leaving her doubtful and cautions about becoming intimately involved with others.

Your Desired Objective ( THIS ONE IS ABSOLUTELY RIGHT)

Very active imagination and may be prone to fantasies and daydreaming. Always dreaming of interesting and exciting things to happen to her. Is a charmer and wants to be admired for that.

Your Actual Problem

"Feeling tension and stress brought on by situations which are out of her control, leaves her feeling helpless, anxious, and in adequate. In order to build her self-esteem back up, she looks to others for recognition, respect, and encouragement. This can be a problem since she tends to blame others for her shortcomings. Searching for solutions that are geared toward her needs and self-consciousness."

To take this quiz: http://www.colorquiz.com/quiz.php (This quiz takes only..5 mins?) Fast and accurate!

And I took some other quiz to see I've got personality disorder. HAHAH! Because I do feel I'm weird.. sometimes.

Disorder | Rating Paranoid: Moderate Schizoid: Moderate Schizotypal: Moderate Antisocial: Low Borderline: Low Histrionic: Moderate Narcissistic: Moderate Avoidant: High Dependent: High Obsessive-Compulsive: Moderate

I shall look at my "HIGH"s. I've got two!

Avoidant personality disorder is characterized by extreme social anxiety. People with this disorder often feel inadequate, avoid social situations, and seek out jobs with little contact with others. Avoidants are fearful of being rejected and worry about embarassing themselves in front of others. They exaggerate the potential difficulties of new situations to rationalize avoiding them. Often, they will create fantasy worlds to substitute for the real one. Unlike schizoid personality disorder, avoidants yearn for social relations yet feel they are unable to obtain them. They are frequently depressed and have low self-confidence.

Dependent personality disorder is characterized by a need to be taken care of. People with this disorder tend to cling to people and fear losing them. They may become suicidal when a break-up is imminent. They tend to let others make important decisions for them and often jump from relationship to relationship. Dependents often remain in abusive relationships. Over-sensitivity to disapproval is common. Dependents often feel helpless and depressed.

The others are just moderate or low. So I guess, I'm relatively normal? HAHAHA!!

To take this quiz: http://www.4degreez.com/misc/personality_disorder_test.mv

And I just took another. OMG. I'M REALLY A DREAMER. HAHAHAHA!

you are a benevolent dreamer.

IF you have more time, try http://www.personaldna.com/

Currently irritated with myself for being so lousy at Chemistry.

Time for EOM.

Sorry for not replying to sms-es and returning calls yesterday. My phone ran out of battery and I couldn't find my charger!

Everything's packed into boxes now. And the boxes are all SEALED.

Oh well, I just "un-sealed" them. HAHA! And it took me quite some time! The carton almost fell onto me. I was perspiring after all the "un-sealing" and sealing.

All for that charger.

I'm still loving "Cooler Than Me".

EOM. EOM EOM EOM. Shall do it after lunch.

I couldn't wake up in the morning. Because I slept at 1 plus?

Why did I stay up so late?

I always regret it the next morning and when I try to recall what I was doing, actually, I was doing nothing. Which sucks.

"Nothing" can keep me occupied for a few hours, sometimes, even the whole day.

Friday then weekends.

Nothing interesting happened today. I guess I'm gonna stay at home for the whole day.

Trying to sort out my contacts on Adium just now and I deleted a few people.

Sometimes, I really wonder if I should DELETE or just leave them there.

But you see, I leave them there and I don't even talk to them so... It just doesn't make sense to me. I read it in magazines before that if we don't talk to someone anymore, we should delete them off from our phonebook/contact list/whatever. It's much better for us.

Healthier.

And that's why, I didn't bother telling some people I changed my phone number.

I'm not trying to make my life more "exciting" by playing "hide-and-seek".

Same for Facebook. HAHAH! I removed some people from friends.

Don't you ever feel weird..... when you have people you don't know on Facebook? And then they know things about you. I feel that we only truly know who our CLOSE friends (those who are still involved in our lives) when it's their birthdays. Facebook reminds us "So and so's Birthday". You know that person had been out of your life when the greeting is just "Happy Birthday". It seems so to me... Really! Sometimes, you'll wish "Happy Birthday" but what.. it's just a greeting without any.... mmm.. sincerity. It will just show how CLOSE we are to that person.

Ok, or maybe it's just me. HAHA!!

Lunchtime.

We danced, we talked and we laughed like crazy.

So what about today?

Currently, my favourite song to dance to is.... USHER'S Hey Daddy.

IT'S SOOOOOOOO NICE. :D

Then, I want to try dancing to Mike Posner's "Cooler Than Me".

My entire day was made up of Cooler Than Me and Hey Daddy.

During the first break, I went to some empty classroom and just danced - Hey Daddy, Lose Yourself, Just Lose It...

I felt so good. HAHAHAA!! Somehow, I think, I dance better without the mirror..... sometimes.

And after that, I was totally WET and my hair was super messy.

Oh well, all worth it!

I slept through quite a few lessons today.

Today's really not fun. And so, I have nothing to blog about.

After dance practice, Shuting, Amanda, Sylvia and I went to Coronation Plaza for dinner and then, over to Starbucks and we stayed till... 9.30pm? HAHAH! Talked SO MUCH. And laughed like crazy. HAHAHAHHAHA!! White tank top.. Duck... Ruffle.... HAHAHHAHAAH!!

Half day tomorrow. Currently using Adium! Adium's much better than MSN for MAC. I seldom see Shuting online and she was the one who recommended Adium to me. So we were all laughing, thinking that maybe it's because of this ADIUM that we can't see her.

Oh well, it's all good now! FINALLY! People can see my MSN display picture! :D

It's like.. seeing light after having been trapped in some cave.

Ok, I guess there's nothing else! Goodnight and sweet dreams! :D

Currently LOVING the song, "Broken" by Sezairi Sezali. I never listened to locals but this song is really great! :D I shall try adding it to my playlist. :D

I'm being really random now.

I'm so tired.

I can see the stars above my heads.

And I haven't choreographed the what.. 4 counts.

Hopefully, I'll be able to come up with something tomorrow.

I spent my entire afternoon with Japple. Tsk.

Japple........... You need to stay away from me.

Dance practice tomorrow!

:( I'M SO UPSET. Everytime I really FEEL like dancing, I can't dance because it'll be at the weirdest places like in National Library's Study Lounge? Or, suddenly, like when I'm walking towards some classroom.

I think we should all make some changes to public toilets. Most of the toilets have GAPS between cubicles, at the bottom.. And SO! That means, I have to wait for the person next to my cubicle to leave before I can actually start dancing in mine. HAHAHAH!! If not, I'll be seen!

HAHAHAHHA!!

ION Orchard's toilet is better. No gaps below so nobody can see your feet!

And sometimes, I'll try dancing in front of the toilet bowl (because there's a sensor) to flush it but MMM.. Most of the times, it doesn't work.

OMG.. I'm blogging nonsense. Better go get some sleep now! GOODNIGHT AND SWEET DREAMS! :D

What should I wish for tonight?

Am I that slow?

That day, my granny said "You're always so slow".

Not only her, it seems like my family thinks so of me.

SIAN... Maybe I'm really slow. I took VERY LONG to finish packing the stuffs in my room.

Then, my granny saw some pills (I don't know what) and she was like "HUH?! YOU NEVER EAT THEM?! No wonder you are growing so slowly.."

And she made me eat them. My granny swallowed half a bottle (I'm supposed to finish the whole bottle of small pills - 1 serving) in like, a minute? And I took like half an hour or so to finish the other half and I was like "I'm so full..." HAHAHAH!!

Tsk. 8-)

When we had dinner at the food centre, everyone was waiting for me to finish my drink.

They wanted to leave already but I was still drinking teh tarik, spoonfuls.

And so.. they all were like "Can you just drink THE WHOLE THING? Like pour it in."

We were discussing the times we all wake up at and YOU KNOW WHAT? I was the earliest. HAHAHA!! 5.30am and that's because I take like one hour to prepare my stuffs.

I'll walk around the house, go into my room, sit for a little while.. HAHAHAH!!

I don't know why, but mornings, I'm really slow.

Oh well.. But I can be VERY FAST also. It depends. For now, I feel like slowing things down.

I don't want to tire myself out.

Today, during PW, I just felt like cursing and swearing again.

Tsk. No, I really do feel bad because I don't know exactly what to do. :(

Now, I don't know which to place first.

Dance? PW?

Oh well~ I need to sort my thoughts out.

There seems to be a lot of things going on within my head but if you ask me, I'll say nothing because I don't know how to explain.

My granny seems more carefree than I am.

She can just play PSP whenever she wants to or log onto Facebook or go shopping or casinos...

And today, I was late for school again.

The guy sitting next to me was in Hwa Chong uniform and I thought we should be about the same age or maybe, he's older than I am and I was waiting for him to press the bell.

BUT HE DIDN'T? And he was just packing his bag when I thought we were both going to alight at the same bus stop. AND SO! The bus continued and I alighted one bus stop away from school. Tsk.

Because of that, I was late. Since I knew I was going to be late, I just strolled and listened to my music....

EOM EOM EOM. I better do something.

If not, it'll really be the END OF ME.

On a random note, "Believe" doesn't seem to exist. "Truth" just seems to be something we all YEARN for and want to get but we'll never because you just can't be sure. Oh well, I shall just believe in myself for now.

Sense of accomplishment but at the same time..

I FINALLY CLEARED AND PACKED EVERYTHING (Almost everything?) IN MY ROOM!

I feel A VERY STRONG sense of accomplishment and achievement. :D

Finally, no more naggings to clear the stuff on my table.

Next thing to clear, my wardrobe.

I'm gonna THROW loads of stuffs away because I don't wear them anymore!

And I will want to buy more. DIE.

I need money. Money money money. I've been spending much on food.

I HAVEN'T DONE THE EOM YET!

End Of Me.

Dance practice tomorrow.

Where should I go to after dance practice?

Wang You's back and I'm supposed to be what, the organizer?

MMMM.. Sushi buffet? As suggested and recommended by Jing Hui, Ying Yen and Amanda Chan. And I'm broke. How how how?

I have a lot of stuffs in my head right now. Actually, they can be NOTHING.

Really. I've been blocking them out but I don't know.. Am I stressed or what?

I don't know I don't know I don't know. Don't ask me don't ask me don't ask me.

I don't know what I'm feeling right now so don't bother to ask because the reply you get.. may not be satisfactory and probably, you'll be offended.

I need music.

I want to dance off my troubles and sweat them all out.

Amanda Chan, when's our nunnery going to be built? I want to live in there already. Let us both make a great escape from this world and not care about ANYTHING at all.

Egoist or Egotist?

I really don't know which am I.

But actually, I guess I'm neither.

My ego only gets bigger when it comes to things that are UNIQUELY Cheryl Tan Si Rong.

Take for example, my signature. I always admire it with appreciation.

Then, my handwriting? I just like it the way it is because it's mine, one and only.

And the last one, my taste. HAHAH! I really think my taste is SUPERB. HAHAHAH! Of course, this only applies to ME.

So you see, I only take PRIDE in things that BELONG SOLEY to me and can never be replaced. :D

It's good, I think. If you don't love yourself, no one else will.

Ok. So how was my day?

Dance practice from approximately 11am to 3pm.

It was bad. Not the practice. I was bad.

I couldn't feel the music today and I was so tired. :(

Sucks big time.

Lunch/Dinner at Ajisen with Amanda Chan and we talked about some serious stuffs again.

I think, if there were adults around, they'd be laughing at us.

"Kids" talking about "Serious Stuffs" when we should be studying and mm.. in our case, dancing.

Whoever said life is like a game of Monopoly is WRONG.

In Monopoly, we don't talk love, family etc. Nothing on relationships but everything on money. But in reality, we all know what we have to deal with. Why can't all humans be GOOD, PURE and INNOCENT? Why can't things be just simple?

Sometimes, we complicate them, "TRUE THAT" -->HAHAHAH!

It's easy to say take a step at a time but don't we all look at the future? I don't know, maybe I'm one of those who THINK TOO FAR AWAY from where I am right now.

Somehow, I feel it's as if we're escaping from some problems we'll face in our lives if we choose not to "plan" and "think" about them. And therefore, I'm always thinking. I want to be prepared for the worst and that's why I'm always thinking of the worst, because nothing is certain for sure. Nothing lasts forever.

Things that come with great speed, goes with great speed. True that.

I'm always thinking, what will happen if a war breaks out one day? What will I bring with me?

What if an earthquake happens someday?

WOAH SIAO. I sound so serious.

But yeah, Amanda Chan! I'm not wrong right?! HAHA!

MMM... It's not that hard. It's just that, we're all afraid of the unknown. Particularly me.

We will never know what's on someone else's minds. And I'm really afraid of that. I'm afraid of things I can't take control of.

Mhm.

AIYA. What is this post all about huh?!

Whatever. I'm just blogging whatever I feel and think. I think I'm quite "transparent" to people already.

Ask me anything and I'll spill everything. I don't hide. But I know, not everyone's as transparent.

Some wear masks. That's what's scary.

That was embarrassing.

Another embarrassing moment.

Just now, I went out to have dinner with Hazel and Kelz.

I wore this white dress.

I DIDN'T know it was THAT THINNNNNN.....

So I guessed, everything underneath could be seen.

That's number one.

I tried to move about to create a "Wave Effect" so that nobody will notice that my dress is actually that thin but it seemed like a futile attempt.

SECOND.

The PRICE TAG WAS UNCUT AND WAS DANGLING, luckily not outside.

OMGGGGGGGG.

I really didn't know!

But anyway, we took LOADS of photos today. I was just bored.

We went to the food junction and took some while waiting for Kelz. People were staring but I DON'T CAREEEE. HAHAH!!

Dinner at Thai Express.

We had......

Phad Thai (??)

Pineapple rice

Green Curry

Tom Yam soup

WEEHEE! :D

Then after that, we went OUT of Vivo City to take more.

And EVEN MORE when we went to Gloria Jeans for "supper".

I had the Macadamia Chocolate cake. FINALLY.

But I think I still prefer tiramisu.

Kelz said something about "du1 zui3".

Yeah, and she said she cannot "du1"

She asked me to TEACH her. How to? I said something like "You just say 'du1' and you'll be able to do it already"

At first, I was just crapping but I realize it's quite true. HAHAHHA!! If you say "du1", you'll really "du1". :D

We were walking around Vivo City and time passed so quickly.

It was ten? And I was supposed to not reach home LATE.

My mum said "Don't come back at around 7 or 8. I want you to pack your stuffs."

And I'm like thinking "DIEEEE. But eh? I come home at ten! It's neither 7 nor 8! So I'm safe!"

Oh well, went home and I'm now uploading the photos we took. OMGGG. SO many.

Dance practice tomorrow!!!!