I still feel rather disturbed.
Kelz told me that he actually asked her about me.
This, I don't know whether to feel happy or not. I was thinking "So what? Did he really have his reasons for doing whatever he did?" I wanted to flip a coin during Economics lecture but I know my flipping sucks and the coin will just roll off to somewhere else and I wouldn't get an answer!
I kept the coin in my palms then tried flipping it over and over and over. Before that, I was praying sincerely "Oh God, can you just give me an answer? I just want to know if he had a reason for doing whatever he did. I promise not to pursue the matter any further but I really want to know. Give me heads if he had his reasons for doing so and tails for not having any reason at all."
I FLIPPED IT OVER AND OVER AND OVER AND OVER AND OVER AND OVER.
"Heads."
Ok, I got that but can I trust that? I always flip a coin whenever I'm in a dilemma or when I'm in need of answers and I think it really helps.
Anyway, we had to run 2.4 km for PE today. I was in position 20. That wasn't really important, I wanted to know if my timing hit A or not.
Yue Quan thought I should run competitive. We'll see how. I was rather impressed with myself because I haven't ran in God-knows-how-many months.
Then, I remembered being mean accidentally. I really didn't mean whatever I said.
When the peeps in my class heard I got 20, they were saying that I should be running for competitive. Xin Yun said "Yeah! I got position 78 and I'm running competitive." When she said "78", I said "HUH?!" real loudly.
I really didn't mean it! I was just kinda shocked by the number? BUT SERIOUSLY, I wasn't trying to be mean! I hoped that she didn't take it to heart because I felt really bad about that. I should have just shut up.
Ok, so everyone was trying to guess who that hot dude was but I didn't tell them. Along the way to the lecture theatre, Yen My and Jing Rong kept asking me then I said "FORGET IT! He's hot but you won't know who he is!" (Something like that) and I didn't realize that there were classes over there and their windows were open so I guess, they heard everything.
School ended at 1.30pm. I didn't want to go home that early and so, I stayed back in school to watch Teng Hui and Sim play tennis. Their game is always amusing. HAHA!! Then, I went for Sim's Chinese lesson because I really didn't want to go home and also, I wanted to have that experience. HAHA! It was quite fun actually. HAHA!! Looking at Sim's face is already funny enough. HAHAHAHHA!
Well, i went home after lunch because I thought I'd better finish my work. However, I fell asleep when I reached home and so, my work's still undone. I still think Ultraman is hot even though he doesn't think so, and even though others don't think so. HAHAH!! Ultraman! You should have more confidence in yourself. SERIOUSLY, if you're not hot, the other dudes will be.... ERR.. They'll feel really demoralized. HAHAH!!!
I'm trying really hard not to be emo in school but then it's kinda tough because I already said that I don't feel close enough to anyone. Not really VERY CLOSE. I mean, aarg, everything's just weird in a way. I talk to the girls - about homework. The only girl I actually share my feelings with is Jeslyn but after all, she's in a different class. THEREFORE, everything's just weird. GET IT?
In summary, I feel rather lonely. Like seriously. When I'm feeling lonely, I'll just start to close up and not talk.
That's all.
